I had another surreal moment today. Another reminder that
this season is coming to an end and new one is just around the corner. Today we
received the notice of intent for next year’s school enrollment. I did not list
Hannah to be enrolled in the school that
she has attended since kindergarten. It was very strange not to include her
with her siblings on the piece of paper, the reservation of a “space,” of a
belonging. Just a simple listing of our children, but she is missing. It is a
bittersweet moment.
I will be listing her
on another piece of paper of college
enrollment, another place to belong, and the other three children’s name won’t
appear on that list. I know it shouldn't, but it does feel like our little
unit, one that I have desperately held onto for dear life at times, is flouting,
like I have had a breach of contract! Wait, you weren't supposed to grow up
this fast, that wasn't part of the deal. Hey! This isn't what I signed up for…or
was it.
Parenting, mothering is pretty incredible. Often times I
feel the burden of utter failure, but I do have moments where I think, “damn, I've
done pretty good considering the circumstances.” And, they are still breathing, walking and
talking, so that must count for something! And tonight is one of those moments. We have made it to a monumental moment - my oldest will be graduating from high school in May and will be enrolling in
college for the fall semester. Hooray for us! Hooray for me! Hooray for her!
